Sheena Was Here

Hello there, just an update to let you know I'm still alive and kicking...

I'm still fighting Pandora ....I think the old girl's trying very hard to stop me penning this ...erm..missive?...It seems while something's going on in the background she slows  ...a go slow I suppose?....

A bit like life at the moment.....nothing's changed..insomuch as where we all are....

Sasha's playing int' garden, in the sunshine.....with Mike.....I'm sitting here typing..(trying my best)....The house is floundering in a slow selling housing market.....

SLOW see?..

That seems to be the word for the moment...I suppose sometimes....slow is best?

Take things slowly...Mind you ...if I slow down any more I'll grind to a halt...

COUNTING TIME ?

In this age of saving precious time

for what?, for where?, for whom?.

of hoarding each second like gold dust..

as if every lost minute spells doom...

hurrying all the while, we move so fast,

not counting the cost to our souls...

racing from A to B...as if driven at speed

to our life's end, finally facing our lost goals

Was it worth it?..the hoarding, the saving..

as if life's a game or a lottery to end soon?

why not slow down, take time, look around you

take stock of who you are, where you really belong

for without knowing yourself, you have no answers

at 'Game Over', it's too late ...your time has gone...

Copyright.....©.....................SIW.... MMVIII.........................

Now......I/we had a Eucalyptus tree.....It flourished in our garden in the past....it reached for the skies....it was....pollarded..(I think that's the term they used...)   It has since died a death... Leaving the totem...Which the man has been to view and is returning int' future to remove... leaving a stump....Probably to be used as a seat maybe?...Now....be that as it may...I wonder?...do I take heart that it'll be used for something for  erm  ... bottoms to rest upon?...Maybe.....but it's such a shame...It won't be either of our bottoms...but some unknown persons who will purchase this house int' future...That's a fact now...the future is changing...just like the poor Eucalyptus....

Maybe my life is tied in with it?...It seemed once it's branches were curtailed from trying to reach the skies, I searched for a way to do the same myself, in a way took it's place maybe?... 'cos I've been looking back at my blogs...some dark, some a lighter shade of dark, some a darker shade of light...and come to the happy conclusion I don't really know that person any more....The time of pain is over...I have a future to look forward to...I have hope...I have a dream...and if it comes true...well....I will truly fly... Of course it'll be somewhere different , somewhere giving a chance of a new life...and if I don't reach for it....it'll be my fault and my fault alone...Life is what you make of it...So, make dreams come true why don't I?

Now......this truly is goodbye...the house is being prettied up for selling...Mike and I are going our separate ways...then the skies the limit as they say... I have loved my time on Spaces, truly enjoyed the to-ing and fro-ing to your sites, it filled a 'space' (pardon the pun)..in my life over the past one and a half years...and I found solace with my friends on here...

Good luck to you all for the future... Happy Blogging.........................Sheena...................xx

......................my trademark.........full stops ...a whole line sometimes...or maybe just 3?...
I do so love the descriptive way it fills a space....It means a 'joining up' to me......no gaps between words,.........no pauses....no way you can ignore the full stop or a line of them...

A full stop. Suddenly that's it...the end...slap bang wallop...there's nowhere else to go, no more words, the dialogue has ended abruptly...You've finished the story, the poem,  or just the letter you're reading...The main point is that you've finished.  THE END.... There is no flow....

I suppose that's what I want from life...a flowing...a connection...no saying goodbye...just Au Revoir...There are far too many painful goodbyes you have to go through in this life...The line of full stops softens the parting ....don't you think?......

Then again maybe it's just me........being  ....me?..................

This is it...I have made decisions which affect life as I know/knew it...and the small circle of people around me...so...a few friends have decided to leave me to it...others still want to know I'm ok...I can only thank you who are still calling round to leave comments, and say thank you for caring...

Sasha is fine... insomuch as her arthritis will let her get on with her life... Mike is reeling from the results of my actions....and I?... Reality has come crashing through my turret window & I'm just trying to sort out my thoughts...always my thoughts...Circling... This is my life...and I mean to live it from now on...not just exist...Maybe that's selfish... I have no way of knowing, I am just being me..........

Bye, and take care..................Sheena.................xx

do you ever think

who you really are and question of yourself why...

why did I get the chance to live my life, then die...

life is so short, with happiness there for the taking...

are you the one holding back with realisation waking?

of love, life & reasons why your path went so wrong...

asking if I take a detour, will I be safe  & where I belong

as time waits for no man or woman, yet why be it so

that you only get one chance at this life,  do you just let go....

let go any thought of the why's, the wherefore's and the fears

this life is a gift, don't ever waste it looking back weeping tears

of anguish for what you've missed, you're at the helm, you can try

to reach for the stars, a heartbeat away, go on I beg of you,  just fly..........

copyright......................©............SIW............MMVIII

Bye For Now...............................

'Tis a strange day...Early this morning...whilst listening to prose spoken by a very sexy voice to take my mind off the forthcoming event, there was apparently an Earthquake...(5.3 on the Richter scale)  Sasha kicked me whilst waking abruptly from sleep....& I thought the next door neighbour was doing her usual early morning thumping & banging...but no....wasn't repeated so....So, back to listening ...

This morning, woken by the alarm,  I faced the day of the operation...small though it be...it weighed large on my mind...So, ready for the off, (after receiving texts from Our Sarah & Mags...Mwahs to you both...kept my mind occupied doing t'texts ...sorry for the blank one Mags!!)... Face on & dressed for the kill...I know , an unfortunate choice of words...but meaningful to my state of mind...Caught the germ carrier to reach the surgery for the 11.00 o'clock appointment  ... arriving at about 10.40am I found I wasn't just 20 mins early...apparently the appointment was for 11.20am...So, on being asked whether I wanted to call back or not...my mind flickered & I had a quick momentary thought of scarpering...but sense prevailed & I said 'No, I'd better stay...thanks'. ...Which turned out to be the best option...The Doctor came into the waiting room called out my name & wanted a quick look before the OP...So, lying ont' couch...he checked the left upper leg/cheek area & pronounced a cyst ...or so he thought...& then off I tried to go, to escape back to the waiting room... to which he said "This way,'"pointing to another door "we'll do it in here right now,  as my next appointment hasn't turned up.'"Wow... lucky me eh?....Gulp.

So,  after signing a consent form...I lay on my front on the couch...talking when spoken to whilst laying my head on the pillow,  I just closed my eyes & floated....Strange really...He left me to find the practice nurse, but she was off sick...so the Head of the practice came in to cover & away we...erm.went?....Joking all the way...It was amazing...The anesthetic was the worst thing...the needle...but after that... I just chatted about the recent earthquake...the need for lipo-suction & could he do it at the same time?... In answer to which he patted my bum & said I didn't need any....so me smiling, suitably cheered by a male voice saying...you're thin enough... Blimey...thin?.. moi`?... That Doctor is now my Hero!!

Right...to get back to the reason for being there...He cut it out & end of story hopefully...He then asked if I wanted  to see it before he placed it in the specimen bottle for analysis...& I faltered a bit...seeing stars...but steadied & thought why not?...So I did....& I didn't faint at all...I had a momentary thought that I should've had my camera handy...but no...Too much info eh?  It actually seems there's a limit to what I'll take a photo of...wonders will never cease..
So, maybe watching Holby, Casualty & CSI have done the trick?...I'm maybe cured of my dicky stomach turning over at the sight of anything faintly  erm...off!!..... Stitched up (he mentioned cross stitch)...covered with a dressing & tape, then warned that I'll have trouble sitting down..."I hardly do"  I said..Lying through my teeth...I was allowed to stand...& was offered the instruments he'd used to take home. Apparently everything is thrown away, everything that's used, metal instruments, the lot....What a flipping waste, they seemed so mad about it...but it's the rules & they have to follow procedure... A throwaway Society an' no mistake...Proof is in this photo>>>>

Criminal Waste I call it.....What price recycling to help the planet?..

Anyway...I had an adventure today...all on my own, I did it, me , Sheena, the world